My Whole Family
Bo Burnham
Everytime I go to dinner
It seems like I'm getting a little bit thinner
I'll sit down at the breakfast table
I can talk, but theyre not able
When I look at them I find
There's a single question on their mind
I wish it could go back to the way it was
Its not easy no because
My whole family thinks I'm gay
I guess its always been that way
Maybe its cause of the way I walk
That makes them think that I like boys
The goddamn question just wont go away
Cause I get asked every single day
But the way they ask it is no disguise
Like "how was your day? Do you like to kiss guys?"
This is the worst, baby this was my fear
Now their opinions are crystal clear
My whole family now is shocked
I'm in the closet and the door is locked
Now my glory days are gone
I was john elway now I'm elton John
My whole family now suspects
That watching Spongebob had side-effects
But I'm not gay and thats what I said
If I'm gay then god strike me dead
Just cause I go to an all-guys school
Doesnt mean justin timberlake makes me drool
When I go outside, what do I see?
The clouds in the sky spell "f-a-g"
I think that god might think I'm gay
What does he know anyway
My grandma gave me a present just last year
And the card said: "happy birthday queer!"
My whole family thinks I'm "fab"
There's a guys butt, hey bo, take a stab!
Why doesn't he get women, theres no other way
Its cause I'm lanky, not cause I'm gay
Just cause I'm afraid of the snow
Or my favorite color is, the rainbow
I dont mean to yell but I fear I must
Cause I'm losing the people that I thought I could trust
Even my boyfriend thinks I'm gay, just kidding
You all probably think I'm gay
Man this song is counterproductive
La la la la lá
Cause my whole family thinks I'm gay
What am I suppose to say?
Baby you gotta see right through the haze
Easy-bake oven was just a phase
My whole family thinks I'm queer
That is all I ever hear
But ive been as straight as a ramp
If you dont count bible camp