Corduroy

Indifferent to the people I detest
But it harms me in a way that even I cannot detect
In my own flesh and blood
(In my own flesh and blood)
I think I've had enough
(I think I've had enough, I've had enough)

I welcome death with open arms
Like an old friend I haven't seen
Since I was young, when young was old
When Daddy did terrible things
Maybe I'd feel better then, when I leave you like this
(Don't let me leave, don't let me leave, don't let me leave it all behind)

While some days are not that bad
And even pleasant one might say
I can't control the thoughts I have
I can't control the present wave
Of emotion
Anxiously hoping
For something or someone
For anything at all

I can't imagine a life without familiarity
I can't imagine what it's like to live
With certainty, I like to re-watch movies
So I know the end of every scene
I know the end of everything
I do, because I won't ever leave
My room
It's safer here, safety's all I want and all I need
Buried my issues here, deep within the walls and in my dreams
In my own atmosphere is where I'll die
So, let me die in peace
I'm on my final breath, my final steps
I've never felt so free

But my head's spinning
I can't help but think of who I'm abandoning
And suddenly my chest cries out in pure panic
It cannot end like this
I say with strength I haven't felt before
And that's when it finally hits

With my hands sweating
Climb down from the ledge of what's all so threatening
But it don't cause me fear no more
My fingers touch the fabric of my jacket made of corduroy
Reminding me of Brentwood and the things that I would die to see again

Die to see again (g-g-gain)
Die to see again (g-g-gain)
Die to see again (g-g-gain)

Whoa, oh
Well, my jacket made of corduroy
Oh I stand to lose
My life, my soul, my time my home, my thoughts, my sweet and sour youth
I can't let go of who I was but I can cut myself in two
And I can pick up all the pieces
And let everybody choose

Choose

Yeah. It's all in your mind, boy, it's all in your head
Leave it all behind you can finish when you're dead
I'll be waiting for you here
When this madness finally ends
Remember who you are, don't forget her when your head's spinning
Stuck in a room with the television on
While you're tripping on 'shrooms
You got your thoughts spilling
But none of it's true
It's a facade
Your heart can tear apart the parts
That make it you

Hello again. It's nice to see you're back
Did you like the things you saw
And do you finally understand why I wear corduroy?
I really like corduroy

Hello, my friend
Anything you'd like to ask?
Any unresolved illusions in your head that make you gag?
I'm just one-call away
So, please, don't be afraid
To call me back