So I

Charli XCX's song 'So I' is a poignant exploration of grief, regret, and the enduring impact of a lost loved one. The lyrics reveal a deep sense of loss and the struggle to cope with the absence of someone who was both a hero and a human to the artist. The recurring line 'Always on my mind (every day, every night)' underscores the constant presence of this person in Charli's thoughts, highlighting the profound effect they had on her life.

The song delves into the complexity of their relationship, marked by moments of fear and admiration. Charli describes the person as having a 'power like a lightning strike,' suggesting a dynamic and influential presence. Despite this, she admits to pushing them away, a decision she now regrets. The lyrics 'why did I push you away?' and 'I was scared sometimes' reflect her internal conflict and the fear that led to her distancing herself. This regret is further emphasized in the lines 'Wish I tried to pull you closer' and 'now I really wish I did,' illustrating the pain of missed opportunities and unspoken words.

Charli also touches on the therapeutic nature of music and the solace it provides. Singing the songs left behind by the departed, she finds a way to keep their memory alive. The repeated assurance 'It's okay to cry' serves as a reminder that expressing grief is a natural and necessary part of healing. The song captures the duality of remembering someone fondly while grappling with the guilt and sadness of their absence. Through 'So I,' Charli XCX offers a raw and honest portrayal of mourning, making it a relatable and cathartic experience for listeners who have faced similar losses.