Always December
Citizen Soldier
The Eternal Winter: A Journey Through Mental Struggles in 'Always December'
Citizen Soldier's 'Always December' is a poignant exploration of mental health struggles, particularly focusing on the feelings of depression and emotional numbness. The song uses the metaphor of December, a month often associated with cold, darkness, and the end of the year, to represent a state of perpetual emotional winter. The lyrics describe a person who feels trapped in their own mind, unable to escape the bleakness that surrounds them, regardless of the actual time of year.
The imagery of snow falling in July and a sunless sky stuck on repeat vividly illustrates the dissonance between the external world and the internal experience of the narrator. This stark contrast emphasizes the isolation and disconnection felt by someone battling depression. The recurring theme of 'always December' signifies a never-ending cycle of despair, where the seasons in the narrator's mind never change, and the rain never stops pouring. This metaphor extends to the idea that no matter where they go or what they do, the internal struggle remains constant.
The song also touches on the difficulty of expressing these feelings to others. Lines like 'No one sees but it's always December in me' highlight the invisible nature of mental health issues. The narrator's attempt to be brave and find reasons to live becomes increasingly challenging as the weight of their emotions grows heavier. The mention of feeling free only when asleep and the desire to stay in bed rather than face the day underscores the debilitating impact of depression. 'Always December' serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of understanding and empathy towards those who may be silently suffering.