How Hard I Try

Filous' song 'How Hard I Try' delves into the emotional turmoil of holding onto the past and the struggle to move forward. The lyrics paint a vivid picture of someone clinging to memories and moments that once brought joy and meaning. The repetition of 'I’m holding on to many things passed' underscores the protagonist's difficulty in letting go of the past, suggesting a deep sense of nostalgia and longing for what once was. This sentiment is further emphasized by the desire to 'change my memories back,' indicating a wish to alter the present by revisiting and perhaps rewriting the past.

The song also explores the theme of unreciprocated love and the pain that comes with it. The lines 'I’m holding on to things you said / Before you forgot what this love really meant to you' highlight the protagonist's struggle to come to terms with a love that has faded or been forgotten by the other person. The repeated attempts to communicate, as expressed in 'The words that I sent to you, never got into you,' reveal a sense of frustration and helplessness. Despite the protagonist's efforts, their feelings and messages remain unacknowledged, adding to the emotional weight of the song.

The chorus, with its repetitive 'No matter how hard I try,' serves as a poignant reminder of the futility of these efforts. It encapsulates the essence of the song: the relentless, yet ultimately fruitless, attempts to hold onto something that is slipping away. This repetition not only reinforces the theme of struggle but also mirrors the cyclical nature of the protagonist's emotional journey. Filous' melancholic melody and introspective lyrics create a powerful narrative about the difficulty of letting go and the enduring impact of past relationships on our present selves.