The First Train Home

Hazlett's song 'The First Train Home' delves into the complexities of emotional turmoil and the struggle to find solace amidst personal chaos. The lyrics paint a vivid picture of someone grappling with their past and present, choosing to sell their memories to escape the pain they bring. The mention of ghosts wanting to come back symbolizes unresolved issues or past traumas that continue to haunt the narrator. The desire to take the first train home reflects a longing for a return to a place of comfort or familiarity, yet there's an underlying sense of weariness and resignation, as if the journey itself is a form of escape from the relentless passage of time.

The song's narrative continues with the protagonist's struggle to process their feelings, oscillating between numbing their emotions with smoke or remaining stagnant. The dirty shoes used for running away signify a pattern of avoidance and the inability to confront their issues head-on. The frustration with someone who finds humor in their pain adds another layer of emotional complexity, highlighting the disconnect between the narrator's internal suffering and the external world's perception.

In the chorus, the narrator expresses a poignant wish for someone to see them as they truly are, lamenting the missed opportunity for connection. The reference to bad luck and a broken mirror underscores a sense of fatalism and disbelief in positive outcomes. The song concludes with a bittersweet acknowledgment of the narrator's tendency to push people away, even as they crave closeness. This duality of wanting connection but fearing vulnerability encapsulates the essence of 'The First Train Home,' making it a deeply relatable exploration of human emotion and the quest for self-understanding.