Friends And Lovers
Incubus
The Duality of Connection in 'Friends And Lovers' by Incubus
Incubus' song 'Friends And Lovers' delves into the intricate dynamics of relationships, exploring the dual roles that people can play in each other's lives. The lyrics paint a picture of a person who feels like a 'ne'er do well,' someone who has perhaps been aimlessly drifting and is now ready to pause and reflect. This moment of introspection leads to the realization that the person they are addressing is someone with whom they share a deep, multifaceted connection. The metaphor of the 'porcelain shell' and 'exoskeleton' suggests vulnerability and protection, indicating that both individuals have their defenses but can walk well together when they let their guards down.
The chorus, 'Because in the end, we are friends and lovers,' encapsulates the essence of the song. It speaks to the idea that a strong relationship can encompass both friendship and romantic love, blurring the lines between the two. The willingness to 'gobble down to bits the things that wall us off from where we belong' signifies a desire to break down barriers and fully embrace the connection. This sentiment is further emphasized by the line, 'What's wrong with you is good for what's wrong with me,' highlighting the complementary nature of their flaws and strengths.
The song also touches on the importance of letting go of past grievances and societal judgments. 'Abandon all the bones we've got to pick' and 'If they all throw stones, start a collection' suggest that holding onto grudges and external criticisms only weighs them down. Instead, they should focus on what they are and what they can be together. The final lines, 'Because you should never have to defend being friends and lovers,' serve as a powerful reminder that their relationship, in all its complexity, is valid and worth cherishing.