Not Myself
John Mayer
The Vulnerability of Being Human: John Mayer's 'Not Myself'
John Mayer's song 'Not Myself' delves into the complexities of human emotions and relationships. The lyrics explore the idea of personal vulnerability and the fear of not being accepted when one is not at their best. Mayer begins by acknowledging that he tries to be on his best behavior but admits that there are moments when he loses his 'worried mind.' This admission sets the stage for the central question of the song: 'Would you want me when I'm not myself?' This line encapsulates the fear of rejection and the hope for unconditional acceptance from a loved one.
The song continues with metaphors that illustrate the unpredictability of life and emotions. Mayer sings about colors changing for no good reason and words shifting from poetry to prose. These lines suggest that just as external elements can change without warning, so can one's internal state. The transition from poetry to prose symbolizes the shift from an idealized, romanticized version of oneself to a more mundane, perhaps less appealing reality. Despite these fluctuations, Mayer expresses a desire for his partner to 'wait it out' and accept him even when he is 'someone else.'
In the final verse, Mayer offers a glimmer of hope and reassurance. He acknowledges that he will 'come around' in time, emphasizing his commitment to his partner. The song concludes with a poignant declaration: 'You're my saving grace.' This line underscores the importance of the partner's acceptance and support in helping him navigate his emotional ups and downs. Through 'Not Myself,' Mayer captures the essence of human vulnerability and the longing for unconditional love and acceptance, making it a deeply relatable and emotionally resonant piece.