The Chokin' Kind

Joss Stone's song "The Chokin' Kind" delves into the complexities and dangers of a possessive and suffocating love. The lyrics express the narrator's frustration and fear as she grapples with a relationship that has become overwhelming and stifling. She begins by stating her genuine intention to love her partner, but laments that her love was not enough. Her partner's desire to control her mind, in addition to her heart, transforms their love into something terrifying and harmful. This kind of love, she describes, is the 'chokin' kind,' a metaphor for a relationship that feels like it's strangling her, rather than nurturing her.

The song further explores the emotional damage that such a relationship can inflict. Stone sings about how a person can be hurt more deeply by having their pride and life ruined than by physical harm. This highlights the psychological and emotional toll of being in a controlling relationship. The metaphor of a hat that doesn't fit her head symbolizes the mismatch and discomfort she feels in this relationship. She emphasizes that this kind of love is not what she needs or wants, and it makes her want to escape.

In the latter part of the song, Stone offers advice to her partner and listeners. She suggests that if someone doesn't like what they have, they should move on rather than trying to change or control it. She advocates for a love that is sweet, kind, and allows the other person to breathe, rather than one that suffocates. The repeated refrain that 'it's the chokin' kind' serves as a powerful reminder of the destructive nature of possessive love. Through her soulful delivery and poignant lyrics, Joss Stone captures the essence of a love that is more harmful than healing, urging for a relationship built on mutual respect and freedom.