Fighting My Demons

Ken Carson's song 'Fighting My Demons' delves into the artist's internal struggles and the ways he copes with them. The lyrics paint a vivid picture of a lifestyle filled with substance use, violence, and existential challenges. The repeated references to smoking kush, popping X, and other drug use suggest that Carson uses these substances as a means to escape or numb his inner turmoil. The chorus, with its repetitive 'I been fighting my demons,' underscores the ongoing battle he faces within himself, hinting at a deeper emotional and psychological struggle.

The song also touches on themes of violence and danger, as seen in lines like 'My boy trigger finger itchin', leave your brains on the seat' and 'Let's play Russian roulette, bitch, who gon' die first? You or me?' These lines suggest a life on the edge, where Carson and his associates are constantly facing life-threatening situations. The metaphor of Russian roulette amplifies the sense of risk and the precariousness of their existence. This dangerous lifestyle is both a symptom and a cause of the demons Carson is fighting, creating a vicious cycle of violence and self-destruction.

Additionally, the song reflects a sense of detachment and emotional numbness. Carson's interactions with others, particularly women, are depicted as transactional and devoid of genuine connection, as seen in lines like 'This bitch said she was hungry, this dick what I feed her.' This detachment could be another manifestation of his internal struggles, where meaningful relationships are sacrificed for temporary relief or distraction. The overall tone of the song is one of despair and resignation, with Carson acknowledging his demons but seemingly unable to escape their grasp.