Growing Sideways

Noah Kahan's 'Growing Sideways' delves into the complexities of mental health, self-discovery, and the struggle to cope with trauma. The song opens with the protagonist seeking therapy, symbolized by the 'overpriced new leather couch,' where he attempts to unpack his emotional baggage. The mention of arguing about Jesus and finding middle ground suggests a search for understanding and reconciliation, both with himself and the world around him. The declaration 'I'm cured' is tinged with irony, indicating that the journey to healing is far from straightforward.

The lyrics further explore the protagonist's internal conflict, as he divides his anger and acknowledges the generational trauma passed down from his parents. This introspection is a 'start,' but the real challenge lies in confronting these emotions head-on. Instead, he admits to ignoring his feelings and moving 'sideways,' a metaphor for avoidance and stagnation. The fear of never truly knowing oneself and the paradox of functioning on 'empty' highlight the tension between survival and genuine self-awareness.

The song also touches on the cyclical nature of mental health struggles, with the protagonist experiencing a manic high after forgetting his medication. This leads to impulsive decisions and a sense of suffering 'in style,' underscoring the impatience and relentlessness of pain. The refrain 'I guess I'll drive' symbolizes a reluctant acceptance of this state, choosing numbness over the overwhelming weight of emotions. The repeated acknowledgment that 'there are worse ways to stay alive' reflects a resigned yet hopeful outlook, suggesting that while the journey is fraught with challenges, it is still worth navigating.