Meaningless

Pain of Salvation's song 'Meaningless' delves into the complex emotions of longing, guilt, and the search for self-ownership. The lyrics paint a vivid picture of a person grappling with the aftermath of infidelity and the emotional turmoil that follows. The recurring imagery of sweat, sex, and regret highlights the physical and emotional residue of the encounter, making it clear that the protagonist is haunted by their actions. The line 'I still smell of sweat, still the scent of my giving in' suggests a deep internal conflict, where the desire to feel remorse is overshadowed by the lingering sensations of the affair.

The chorus, with its repeated question 'How the hell am I supposed to keep myself when you are so damn far away,' underscores the protagonist's sense of disconnection and helplessness. The distance from their significant other exacerbates their feelings of meaninglessness and loss of self. This emotional void is further emphasized by the line 'And I am not mine,' indicating a profound sense of alienation from one's own identity.

In the latter part of the song, the protagonist expresses a desperate need for something they can control, a space or feeling that is entirely their own. This culminates in the acceptance of guilt as a form of ownership. The lines 'I need something of my own, something with a locked door, a room just for me alone' reflect a yearning for personal autonomy and a way to reclaim a sense of self, even if it means embracing negative emotions. The final acceptance of guilt as 'a hole but it's mine' signifies a complex reconciliation with their actions and emotions, highlighting the human need for self-ownership, even in the face of moral ambiguity.