Closer To Myself

Kendall Payne's song 'Closer To Myself' delves into the profound journey of self-discovery and the struggle to find one's true identity. The lyrics open with a sense of urgency and introspection, as the narrator feels a burning need to understand who they truly are. This hunger for self-awareness disrupts their complacency, forcing them to confront their inner self. The reference to Jacob, a biblical figure who walked with a limp as a reminder of his encounter with God, underscores the idea that personal struggles and imperfections can lead to greater spiritual and self-awareness.

The chorus expresses a deep yearning for something more fulfilling than the superficial pleasures of life. The narrator desires to be 'covered in leaves and rolled over again,' symbolizing a rebirth or renewal. This imagery suggests a shedding of past identities and a return to a more authentic self. The repetition of the phrase 'I've been everybody else now I wanna be something closer to myself' highlights the exhaustion and dissatisfaction that comes from living up to others' expectations and the longing to embrace one's true nature.

In the second verse, the narrator seeks transformation and purification. They ask to be painted in a different light and marked with ash until they are clean again, indicating a desire for a fresh start and a release from past burdens. The line 'I'm so sick and tired of being sick and tired' captures the frustration and weariness of living a life that doesn't align with one's true self. Ultimately, the song is a powerful anthem of self-acceptance and the quest for a deeper, more meaningful connection with oneself and others.