Nerd vs. Geek

Rhett & Link Rhett & Link

What do you think you're doing nerd?
Did you just call me a nerd, geek?
Ya, nerd!

(Nerd growls)
Yes I'm a nerd
Bookworm, I'm studious!
From my cerebral cortex to my gluteus
Back in kindergarten I aced my college entrance exam
Now, I'm no rocket scientist
Oh wait, I am!
When I pour my alpha-bits, I get nothing my straight a's
My retainer and headgear connect to a back brace
I've got a pocket-protector protector protector
I broke my glasses on purpose so I could tape em together
Run back to reddit, and type stuff no one will see
You're a geek that means you're just a hipster wannabe

(Geek)
That's right I'm a geek
I've got brains and a personality
I wear my glasses sincerely
And my t-shirt ironically
There are some things you can't learn in a class
Or else I'd sign you up for 'intro to how not to be a social outcast'
You're just so early 2013
I was the cool form of uncool before uncool became a thing
I use an app to pair pork with the perfect bordeaux
Too bad there's no app to neutralize your b. O
While you're lost in second life letting your fingernails grow long
I'll be syncing up my iPhone, tablet, TV and your mom

(Nerd)
Sure grooming's not my thing
But I don't care
I look so good in chainmail that it's not renaissance faire

(Nerd)
Doesn't larp stand for loser and reject party?
I'd rather cosplay with hotties than play fake army
I tried dungeons and dragons once
And I died, of boredom
But I'll still kick your assassin's creed post-mortem
Mario party's the only one you're getting invited to
Your life is like skyrim
An endless quest of solitude

(Nerd)
Ooh, you beat angry birds
You're not a gamer cause you battle your friends with words
You click on cute icons, I execute commands
Do you really need a 'genius' to teach you garage band?

(Geek)
I landed the first roflcopter
And took in orphans when I was 12
Cause I'm an early adopter
I can wear Google glass without looking like a dweeb
Ok, Maybe not
But I can yelp us some good food to eat

(Nerd)
You need 16 gigs of ram
To watch a Steve Jobs doc?
I keep an actual ram in my pc, his name is spock

(Geek)
I'm a new console
Your face is birth control
I troll brony sites, you look like an actual troll

(Nerd)
I'm fluent in C++
[Std: Cout you just suck! N]
Can your iPhone autocorrect your dumb haircut?

(Geek)
Hold on a second
Let me tweet this infographic I made
That illustrates the fact you'll never get to procreate

(Nerd)
I just haven't met a woman
Of a high enough caliber
The only dates you have
Are on your go-go-Google calendar

(Geek)
You're losing this battle
Your foam sword won't help
In the future you'll randomly access this memory
And crap yourself

(Nerd and robot)
Did I mention I built a dancing robot?
No one gives a shatner about your skinny jeans
Do you even know what url means?

(Geek)
You don't know what you're tolkien about
(Sung in some fictional tolkien dialect)
Much wind pourannotates from your mouth you cowardly dog!
You are ugly, and your mother dresses you
Go kiss an orc

(Nerd)
You know

(Both Nerd and Geek)
You are a classic example of the inverse ratio
Between the size of the mouth and the size of the brain

  1. Nerd vs. Geek
  2. I'm On Vacation
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