Domingo (The Bridesmaid's Song)

Hit it

The bridesmaids wanted a celebration
So we took a trip, bachelorette vacation
'Cause we know she needs one
A break from Matthew
Just kidding, Matt
We're glad she has you

We're out, the shots are flowing, yeah
Guys on the dance floor grooving, yeah
We say: No thanks, she's taken, yeah
Sing it

Now she's with a hot guy, but he looks gay
Heard his name is Domingo
Second location, maybe he's bi
Still dancing with Domingo
Third location, fully straight, fully touching Domingo
I can't wait to be his wife
She's pointing to Domingo

So quick question, who's Domingo?
Oh, just this random guy we met, I told you about him
I'm positive you did not

In the bathroom, we take her outside
She says: Don't worry, we won't cross the line
Think of your fiancé
She says: Good reminder
Hands me her ring
Then we can't find her

You took off your ring? Is this true?
Well, I just didn't want to lose it in the hot tub
What hot tub?

Now we're back in the house, in the hot tub
She's there with Domingo
Ask us to leave, get a hotel
She's vibing with Domingo

You asked them to leave and get a hotel?
Shh you're missing it

At the Marriott, googling Domingo
Just to make sure he's not psycho
But he's actually a doctor and randomly a model
And he volunteers with weird sick animals

Is the point of this song just that Kelsey cheated on me all weekend?
No, the point is, it's Espresso
You're not even listening to the lyrics
That's all I'm listening to

The next day, she said: Nothing happened
They talked all night about you, Matthew
Then at brunch, she just starts crying
We ask her: Why?
She says: I'm just so tired
We say: Take a nap
She says: I'm not that kind of tired

Okay, I need answers now about you
And whoever this Domingo guy is
And not for nothing, but the rhyme scheme has gone completely out the window
Okay look, I'm sorry I met someone
I connected with
But Domingo is in the past
Kelsey, I'm here
See now, if this is Domingo, I'm gonna be pissed

Hey Matt, came all this way
Had to explain, direct from Domingo
Kelsey's a friend, she's like my sis
But we did hook up though

What? Why would you guys tell me this through song?
I hope we can still be friends