Finding Myself

In 'Finding Myself,' Smile Empty Soul delves into the complex emotions surrounding self-identity and personal freedom. The lyrics express a deep sense of confusion and conflict, as the narrator grapples with the need to break free from a relationship that has become suffocating. The opening lines, 'I don't care anymore if I let you down / I believe that I need to be free,' set the tone for a journey of self-discovery. The narrator acknowledges the comfort and familiarity of their partner's presence but also recognizes that this has led to a loss of their true self.

The recurring refrain, 'And I thought that I found myself today / And I thought that I had control,' highlights the fleeting moments of clarity and independence the narrator experiences. These moments are quickly overshadowed by the realization that they are still deeply dependent on their partner. The lyrics, 'All the change in my life just fell away / For a moment I didn't need you,' suggest that the narrator's attempts at change are temporary and ultimately unsuccessful. This cyclical pattern of seeking freedom and falling back into dependency underscores the internal struggle the narrator faces.

The song also touches on themes of emotional exhaustion and the burden of care. The lines, 'All these tears that I've cried / You must be tired of taking care of me,' reveal the narrator's awareness of the toll their emotional state has taken on their partner. Despite this, the narrator admits, 'I'm a liar cause really it's what I need,' indicating a deep-seated fear of being alone and a reliance on their partner's support. The song's conclusion, with its repeated refrain, emphasizes the ongoing nature of this struggle and the difficulty of achieving true self-identity and independence.