The Dark Struggle of Mental Turmoil in '$uicideBoy$' AM/PM

The song 'AM/PM' by $uicideBoy$ delves deep into the harrowing experiences of mental health struggles, particularly focusing on insomnia, depression, and suicidal thoughts. The lyrics paint a vivid picture of a life plagued by relentless mental anguish, where the protagonist is unable to find peace or solace. The opening lines, 'Windows down with a frown, ash on my jeans / Been up eatin' beans,' set a somber tone, highlighting a sense of desolation and routine monotony. The recurring imagery of insomnia and the inability to find tranquility underscores the constant battle with inner demons.

The song's narrative continues to explore the protagonist's deteriorating mental state, with lines like 'Put me outta my misery, insomnia drivin' me mental' and 'I ain't slept in six weeks / Haven't ate since Wednesday.' These lines emphasize the physical and emotional toll that mental health issues can take on an individual. The mention of 'putting on a front' suggests a facade of normalcy, masking the true extent of their suffering. The lyrics also touch on the societal stigma surrounding mental health, with references to being called derogatory names and the dismissive attitude of others who fail to understand the severity of the protagonist's condition.

The song reaches a poignant climax with the contemplation of suicide, as expressed in the lines 'I wonder what they'd say after I slice my wrists / Two slits, I'm gone in the endless abyss.' This stark depiction of suicidal ideation serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of mental health awareness and the need for empathy and support. The closing lines, 'Pour, pourin' my emotions in a styrofoam cup / Gulping it down 'till I don't give a fuck,' illustrate a desperate attempt to numb the pain through substance use, further highlighting the depth of the protagonist's despair. 'AM/PM' is a raw and unfiltered portrayal of the struggles faced by those battling mental health issues, urging listeners to recognize and address the importance of mental well-being.

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  1. ...And To Those I Love, Thanks For Sticking Around
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