The End Of The Line

[JENNY]
I'm Jenny

[SARA]
I'm Sara

[JENNY]
She's Sara

[SARA]
She's Jen

[BOTH]
Been best friends forever

[JENNY]
Well, since we were ten

[BOTH]
Met at ballet class
And ever since then
We became inseparable

[JENNY]
The damage was irreparable

[SARA]
Jen's like my sister

[JENNY]
And Sara's like mine

[BOTH]
Friends till the end of the line

Had nothing much in common

[SARA]
Loved horses

[JENNY]
Loved shoes

[BOTH]
But we were attached at the hip

[SARA]
Jen was like a goddess
My mentor and muse

[JENNY]
She was a nerd and a drip

[BOTH]
But we would be together every hour of the day
People would see us and say:
It's Jenny, and Sara
Two peas in a pod

[SARA]
Well, if one pea was perfect

[JENNY]
And one pea was odd
First string-

[SARA]
And spare!

[BOTH]
On the volleyball squad

[JENNY]
Happy and gregarious

[SARA]
My thrills were just vicarious

[JENNY coughs]

[SARA, SPOKEN]
Woo

[JENNY]
She'd point the spotlight

[SARA]
She'd bask in the shine

[BOTH]
Friends till the end of the line

[JENNY]
My skin was just like porcelain
Hers was all zits

[SARA]
My pores were perpetually blocked

[JENNY]
I developed early
She had no tits

[SARA]
My cupboard was woefully stocked

[JENNY]
Why would I be seen
With such a social refugee?

[SARA]
'Cause you always looked good next to me!

[JENNY, SPOKEN]
That's right!

[BOTH, SUNG]
So we were Jenny, and Sarah
A vulgar display

[SARA]
The queen of the prom

[JENNY]
And her weird protege

I starred-

[SARA]
I ran lights-

[BOTH]
In the school cabaret

[JENNY]
I mean, have you heard Sarah sing?
Good golly, it's embarrassing

[SARA sings a feeble note]

[BOTH]
We were contrary forces
Who somehow combine
Friends till the end of the line

[SARA]
Then something crazy happened
Right after twelfth grade
That summer I blossomed and bloomed
I stepped into the sunlight
After years in the shade
And a beautiful swan was exhumed

[JENNY]
Meanwhile, I was working
At the local Dairy Queen
And ballooned up to plus-size sixteen

[SARA, SPOKEN]
Uh-Jenny

[JENNY]
Eighteen
It's just so delicious

[SARA]
We both showed up to college
And, no need to pretend
I was popular right off the bat
And everyone was asking:
Sarah, who is your friend?
The one who's so-

[JENNY, SPOKEN]
Interesting?

[SARA, SPOKEN]
Fat

(SUNG)
All this malice aimed at Jenny
Was quite startling and new
So I did what all best friends would do

I said, I'm Sara
She's Jenny

We used to be close
Now she's desperate, and clingy
And sort of morose
I heard she gobbles
Peanut Buster parfaits by the gross
In all the world is there a sight
More tragic than this parasite?

[BOTH]
So that is our story
And ain't it divine!
Friends till the end of the-

[JENNY]
The cold bitter end

[SARA]
I guess

[BOTH]
This is the end of the line