This Road I Know

This a poem I wrote called This Road I Know
There's this flash I get often, a fever dream or a vision of sorts
Most times late at night
And I haven't found out why, but I know exactly why
I'm on this road, and I hear gravel underneath me, and I feel it too
And I don't know where I am, but I know exactly where I am
It's dark, it's really dark
And the car is warm, but somehow I can feel how cold the night is
I don't know where the road leads, but I know exactly where it ends
You see, I keep driving, and all I see for the longest while is my headlights
For an eternity it seems
And everything is desolate and empty and nothing and hopeless
I'm lost, but I know where I'm going
I'm safe, I'm warm, I'm driving
And I see this small light
A dim one growing bigger and brighter and closer and stronger
And the closer I get, the more I see
I make out a house with light strewn across it, a porch, and cars
Some frosted windshields that hadn't been touched for hours
I hear a song, and it's faint
And I can't make out the name, but I know every word
I feel my feet first
And it's cold, and they're crunching, and it's the sound of driveways
And the wind takes my breath with it
And then I walk up to this door, and I knock even though I feel I don't have to
And I don't know where I am, but I know exactly where I am
And this crack of light widens on this porch underneath me as this door opens
And this brown-haired girl with the brightest smile
I don't know who she is, but I know her so well
And behind her, the warmest home I'd ever seen
It's orange and comfortable, there's fire, and it's bulb-lit
She says
Where have you been? We've been waiting on you all night
We've missed you
She says to the kindest smirk I'd seen in so long
Then she tapers off the sentence with the
With the peaceful sound that a lady makes
She grabs me on the forearms, pulls softly into the dining room
And there's people, and they're happy, and they're content for one
I don't know who they are, but I know exactly who they are
And we're all standing, and I'm laughing at a joke I'll never hear again
I don't know where I am, but I know exactly where I am
And then she tucks her head between my collar as a friend
Between my collar and my jaw, and there's no weight at all
And I don't know where I am, but there's no weight at all
It's laughter and grins and no tomorrow to win
And I don't know where I am, but I know exactly where I am
I don't know where I am, but I know exactly where I am