Mi Niñez

I started to run, with each step I understood it more
That life wasn't what I believed
I've run so much that I don't even know where I came from
A voice told me to run even if the past walks

I met the pain that makes you feel like trash
The one that torments and repeats that there's no cure
That torture just by remembering
There's nothing harder than not being able to forget

When they abused me without the need for deceit
I started to die inside at just seven years old
I wondered, why did they hurt me?
Am I the darkest sheep in the flock?

Imagine a child who sleeps to dream
Because waking up to the truth is a nightmare
While on Sunday I heard preaching
That we must forgive and turn the other cheek

If you find my childhood, tell it how much I've searched
That I haven't stopped running, and that I've already forgiven it
If your past makes you cry, move under my cloud
And if life brings you down, learn, clean up, and rise!

If I tell mom, maybe she'll get angry
No one will believe, they say: Kids make things up
I erased dreams from my list, they damaged my perception
Changed my point of view, something was wrong, I had to run

Inside me there was a monster sleeping
I thought it would never end, I was sick
Addicted to sex and pornography, the filth that is felt
I've lived it firsthand, no need to tell me
Bravery is never enough

There's a time to be brave and another to be smart
What hurts me the most is that it took my childhood
They think I'm exaggerating and that it doesn't matter
It's disgusting, but it was necessary
I couldn't talk to you without going through that ordeal

If you find my childhood, tell it how much I've searched
That I haven't stopped running, and that I've already forgiven it
If your past makes you cry, move under my cloud
And if life brings you down, learn, clean up, and rise!

There's no time to lose, I won't stop!
People die, and sometimes they die before being born, but
I'm still here, and every second is a gift
Feeding the good I could make the bad in me die

I ran to the medicine that healed my anger
Instant healing, there was no therapy
And that's how I met Jesus of Nazareth
I had heard of him but now I can see him

Perhaps I would have been that homosexual
Perhaps I would have been sick with a deadly virus
Perhaps what would have happened if I hadn't run away?
I would be dead if I hadn't met him!

You were that breeze that came to caress me
When I was on the roof thinking of jumping
You could have rejected me, but you gave me life and
I could get out of the dead-end alley!

If you find my childhood, tell it how much I've searched
That I haven't stopped running, and that I've already forgiven it
If your past makes you cry, move under my cloud
And if life brings you down, learn, clean up, and rise!

If you find my childhood
Tell it how much I've searched
That I haven't stopped running