Códice

If I live to love myself and I love myself to death
Don't blame the waves if you don't understand the tides
I continue with the obsession of wanting to be happy
Trying not to break forever like Pangea
I went from being on the sidelines to writing on it
The looks never made me feel good
Even if you don't believe, I'm not looking anymore
For the forbidden fruit of Eden
Now I am the fruit of what I will never sow
I have entered the wolf's mouth looking for the moon and I know
That I can transform like him
I blamed life when it's the world
The one responsible for nothing ever going so well
Do you think it doesn't hurt me not to talk
To those with whom there was no time to sleep?
I know many kill me because
I can see the hatred I've grown tired of loving
And in the end I suppose I just have to keep going
I suppose everything will be fine
I suppose there will be no more twisting
I suppose I must be more faithful to myself
I suppose I shouldn't assume

If silence implies consent, I know well that I have given
Now I know I love myself, I know it has cost me
I know life doesn't want me by your side
I took so long to get rid of the bad
If silence implies consent, I know well that I have given
Now I know I love myself, I know it has cost me
I know life doesn't want me by your side
I took so long to get rid of the bad

And do you think it doesn't hurt me to see
How I can't give you the good
Not being reciprocated, being screwed
In this world of hatred and selfishness?
I am the same as when I started
Just cleaner in words and fuller of faith
Conformity never made me be
I always aspired to be a giant since I was a child to see
Those clouds in the sky that I now look at from below
But, knowing full well, that one day I will touch
That's why I know that despite what I went through
Mom, hug me, you gave me life and I swear I will enjoy it
Dad, I want to be strong like you
But I promise I try and I know I won't achieve it
That's why I want to meet with the one who told me I couldn't
That I wasn't a person to be happy too and God
I live in the silence of not having the reason
But seeking to have it to understand the pain

If silence implies consent, I know well that I have given
Now I know I love myself, I know it has cost me
I know life doesn't want me by your side
I took so long to get rid of the bad
If silence implies consent, I know well that I have given
Now I know I love myself, I know it has cost me
I know life doesn't want me by your side
I took so long to get rid of the bad

And hurting is remembering, killing oneself
To be remembered not thinking is forgetting and forgetting you
Is not thinking about the suspense of getting it right
Is where magic is born and chance makes sense
But how can I deny myself the ability to follow my current
If since always exists, it always leads me to the sea?
Despite what I tried, I never understood the tides
Since I live to love myself and die to love myself more
To love myself more, another day the same, if not who will love me?