La Gorda!

The other night at the dance, I hooked up with a big girl who looked like a whale,
Because for sure her belly and her waist were stuffed like a dead chicken,
I got her on the scooter, before starting it, the bike was already smoking,
The big girl was squeezing me, I was suffocating, I asked if she wrestled sumo,
That girl weighed so much we couldn't make it up a hill,
And when we turned around,
All the cars on the avenue had to pull over to the curb.
If you saw what that girl was like, man!!
We got to my little house and my dog was being stubborn,
Because to get the big girl through, I tossed his bed halfway in the yard.
When we were inside, the big girl headed for the kitchen,
She was raiding the fridge and even biting the ice,
I brought her to the bedroom, dropping food in the hallway,
The big girl chased me and gobbled it up, squealing.
But when it came to making love, she felt it, she felt it, and I’m telling you what happened:
Get on, get on, get on, big girl,
No, no, no, no, you’re making me feel like rubber,
Get down, get down, get down, big girl,
My neck veins are about to burst.
Get on, get on, get on, big girl,
No, no, no, no, you’re making me feel like rubber,
Get down, get down, get down, big girl,
And as long as you don’t eat cake!!
Don’t mess with me, big girl!
Are we making love?
Don’t eat any more cake,
Let go!! Right there!!
This is wild, man!!
Because of that mutant big girl who almost made me ask for a transplant,
Because my limbs were getting squeezed,
I was sweating from everywhere too,
She was squeezing me with her big legs,
What I’m telling you isn’t nonsense,
The goat leg broke,
She crushed me with her little butt,
My eyeballs popped out,
I thought I’d be doing great with the big girl,
But Saturday night,
I ended up at the hospital.
Someone get the big girl down,
Someone get the big girl down,
My veins are about to burst,
And she needs to ease up on the cake.
Someone get the big girl down,
Someone get the big girl down,
My veins are about to burst,
And she needs to ease up on the cake!!!
Get off!!
Get down, big girl!!!!!