Roast Yourself Challenge

Hello, I'm Caeli
Or Caelike?
Or Caelike
Oh, I don't know, I'm confused
Because
I live my life
Without neurons day by day
I survive with videos that are
Complete garbage
You waste your time
Watching my videos
You click
Hoping to see something good
By the 14th second, you're already bored
Better go to another YouTuber
Who can make you laugh
I know I'm fake
Forced
Without grace
You comment, dislike, and
Then you leave?
On Whiney Wednesdays, you check
My channel
I uploaded a new video
Did you get curious?
It's crap
And it's not shitty
But the temptation
You couldn't resist
I know you subscribe even if it's just
To criticize me
I don't know why you hate me
Are you tired of looking at me?
My plucked eyebrows
My squashed boobs
Wait, I need to calm down
My voice isn't special
It can be frustrating
Without exaggerating
I'm an artificial fool
I used to be fat and now I'm flat
Former natural blonde
And don't even mention
Juanxita
She's funnier than me
At least she has her Juanxito
And more neurons
Oh my God

That I was fat, now I'm thin
That if I only wear shorts
That if I don't wear underwear?
That if I can't rhyme
Well, no
I can't sing either
And when recording, I keep losing focus
If I don't upload on time
I won't respect you
If I'm a board
For surfing?
Watch out for your boyfriend
If he follows me on Instagram
Don't let him see my photos
Because I show everything
Caeli
Stop trying
Stop dreaming
That you'll never achieve anything
You have no talent
And let's not talk about singing
So pathetic, my girl
Go call your parents
I beg you to stop making your crappy videos
We're already tired
Of seeing all your tantrums
Are you fed up already?
Don't want to see more?
We're already 10 million
In 6 years on the channel
Now you say
You want to act?
What do you think, poor naive
If you only know how to greet?
You only know how to show off
You only know how to pose
You only know how to take your damn Instagram photos
Stop hunting
You won't hook them
In Los Angeles, there are no boyfriends
To hang on
Now you'll have to show talent
Better do a good deed for the world
And go grow up

That I was fat, now I'm thin
That if I only wear shorts
That if I don't wear underwear?
That if I can't rhyme
Well, no
I can't sing either
And when recording, I keep losing focus
If I don't upload on time
I won't respect you
If I'm a board
For surfing?

I used a little trick
To become famous
Hooking up with a YouTuber
And another
And another
And that one
And the other
And that guy too
And no, he doesn't count
And the other
And the other
And the other
Many subscribers were gifted to me
But over time
That guy bored me
Others followed
With better channels
I never cared
Even if they were brothers
From being partner hunters
The world accused me
But it was worth it
My channel exploded

That I was fat, now I'm thin
That if I only wear shorts
That if I don't wear underwear?
That if I can't rhyme
Well, no
I can't sing either
And when recording, I keep losing focus
If I don't upload on time
I won't respect you
If I'm a board
For surfing?

Well
This will never stop