Tu mama la gorda

YOUR MOMMA'S FAT
If y'all don't understand me,
your momma's fat,
if you act too smart,
your momma's fat
If you mess with my soup,
your momma's fat,
your momma's fat,
your momma's fat
If I'm confused
'cause I don't know the result
of the circumference
of the gravity of the matter,
I tell you your momma's fat
If you act stupid,
your momma's fat,
anyway you put it,
your momma's fat

Good morning Puerto Rico
it's like twelve something
so it's time to get up
and take a stroll
You know, a little walk,
unruffled
mixed with sofrito
and if they bring me the fried codfish
I'll eat it,
get in the groove
I wash it down with coffee
damn and then I go
smoke a bit of weed
to shoot through
the ozone layer
I know like the pope
I don't move
not even to pick up a can
I'm lazy
and I don't have a job,
I don't lift a finger
When I start
I always back out,
I have rice with ketchup for lunch
when I'm broke
But being broke
is not my fault,
this is the piggy bank's fault
and it's empty because
what's inside was stolen
They stuck their feet
and hands in
and I saw who they were,
they were some dwarfs
they pissed me off
They're so tiny
they piss me off,
they bother me I hope
I catch them by the neck
and split them in half
with their super sword
Take off their skin
to make drums
and play batucada,
all night batucada
and then fill that skin
with jam
It's better not with salad,
with pickles,
lettuce, tomato
a splash of oil
a splash of avocado,
and eat them
and swallow them
Like candies
I eat them one by one
triplets or twins,
I don't care
what matters is that they disappear
Before dawn
and I wash them down with
fresh milk,
directly from the cow's udder
then go to the bathroom
and flush it down
and get lost in the pipes
mixed with poop
swimming with the rat,
while I lower the toilet lid
They get intoxicated
with chlorine water, (but they're already dead)
Don't interrupt me
this is my journey
this is my thing,
this is personal
More personal
than vaginal fungus,
+ personal than dental floss
covering the anal area,
+ personal than putting salt
up the nasal passage
And I'm not done
I'm going to put a slingshot cable
on their nipples,
greased with butter,
so they die of tickles
And their ribs explode.
And then I'm going to spit a loogie
with phlegm the color of cream
And I'm going off
the topic but I don't care
because even if you don't understand me.
your momma's fat
your momma's fat
your momma's fat (repeat)

these dwarfs
are rowdy,
crazy they have skin
the color of green boogers
and little by little
they camouflage
with coconut palms
so no one sees them
so no one knows
what they're hiding between their teeth,
they change the soles
of their shoes all the time
to leave no traces
to leave no footprints
in the sand,
while they steal my eggplants,
this is not my fault but it burns me
I'm going to hit them with a shock
like Roberto Rueda,
I have my neck lined with sorrows
hit with good work
the finest molasses
the cream,
let's see how it tastes how it sounds,
these dwarfs have many bad habits
they sell even their eyelashes,
if you want them in a combo you take them
with all the eye crust,
they sell
everything, everything, everything you want
they're beasts
they're old-timers
with old blood,
with a worm heart
and gizzard skin,
they get into trouble wherever they go
to create a fight
to create fucking trouble,
to try to bribe the party,
but with my stick's cream I'll shave them,
there's enough blame here
to blame them
and give them a beating
and if they don't like it
and if they don't understand me,
and if they don't get it
your momma's fat
your momma's fat
your momma's fat

If y'all don't understand me,
your momma's fat,
if you act too smart,
your momma's fat.....