De mil maneras

Don Nemesio Pascual
martyr of morality
so proper, so formal
so correct
was found in a coma
with his dick stuck in his ass
when he finally could speak
he let out a gasp
along with a terrible moan
"I’m dying, for god’s sake," he repeated
oh damn, I’m dying fucked up

The family and the club "The Hot Rabbit"
pray for his soul
and may the waltz of good customers
play over and over at the bar

Dying in a thousand ways
dressed as a nurse
or Little Red Riding Hood at a funeral
in the middle of a bender
with two strippers
or anally violated by a dog
stuck in the closet of a gay bar
beaten by the law
eaten by crabs,
bleeding out from a scare
from a castration done in bites

Don Francisco Avilés
the corpse of the month
passed away next to the roll of Scottex
he had a heart attack
while taking a dump
and his holy wife who sensed the worst
anxiously called the fire department
"My husband isn’t coming out of the bathroom
please come quick, gentlemen"

Don Francisco was stiff with his pants down
when death came to visit him
sitting on the Roca "taking a dump"
checking the league in the Marca

Dying from poisoning
from a bad pussy
getting run over by a Mini
from a heart attack, chained
in a BDSM session
or running away from an ugly one like Houdini
giving yourself an enema in a sex shop
reading the advice column in Super Pop
about a pimple on your balls
from a bad fart
in a sauna, naked and suffocated

Doña Puri Pinzón
never imagined
that her vibrator would give her
besides pleasure in the squeak
the shock that would kill her
Doña Puri Pinzón
a real piece of work
ran into the Grim Reaper
while painting her latex dick
the shield and flag of Spain

The shock left Doña Pinzón stiff
with her pubic hair on fire
when the SAMUR arrived they said
"It smells like burnt fish here"

Dying while erasing zeros
from widowed cocksuckers
drowned by an olive pit