International Love

(Yeah, this here is a song about love)

The first time felt like Boris Becker - Am I already in?
A worse start right away, you said: It's not that bad!
I had heard a lot about this place before,
but it never crossed my mind that I would find someone like you in here.
All the other women before you just wanted to play games with me, which I didn't like,
so I didn't know much about love until you came.
I looked at you and didn't take long to understand,
no other woman so confident,
no other woman so good-looking.
No other woman so easy to switch off with just a push of a button,
and that for a guy like me, who everyone spits on.
Whose opinion is never asked for, and when I speak, no one listens.
I was already thinking of ending my life, but then there you were.
You completely healed me in just one night,
and brought some color back into my gray life.
Suddenly you were there, asking me to come closer - that's how the affair began!

Chorus:
I've never had a woman like you,
without a body, without a face.
Who only speaks to me through a screen,
and yet I love you!
You've turned my head around,
just like all your victims.
What more do you have to offer me, baby?
You have chat rooms, you have websites,
so I can share my opinion with everyone worldwide.
I suddenly feel like a better person,
but I'm glad no one recognizes my face out there!

Things moved pretty fast with us two,
soon everything was official.
The registry office was AOL, we traveled around the world.
You have so many sides and if I don't like one,
you have the links ready,
so I can move on to the next one.
Through you I meet people,
you make connections clear to me,
you satisfy me completely,
and we've never even had sex.
And I remember - last year -
I almost died of self-pity,
and then you came and showed me this completely new world!
I feel like I'm in paradise,
and I live in the industrial area,
so I'm sitting here writing you this love song.
Because I've never had a woman like you,
and I'm almost forty, I'm scared.
And through you I meet millions of losers online, just like me!

Chorus x2

I only turned you on once,
and you drove me crazy,
oh baby, we surf around the world,
I've already packed my things, yeah!

I don't need to go out to eat with you,
don't need to watch TV with you,
turn you off when you annoy me,
and force you to take me seriously.
Don't have to feed you,
or constantly dress you,
all you cost me
are a few phone units.

I only turned you on once,
and you, you drove me crazy,
oh baby, we surf around the world,
I've already packed my things, yeah!