Por Si Sirve De Algo

Seems like this finally ends
I've given all I could give
Just need to close my eyes
I wanted to leave this place
Maybe while the time comes
I could try to reconcile
My most silent and sincere side
With that of a loyal and helpful dog

The blood staining my hands
Some is mine, the rest I earned
I find it all so equal now
Whose is whose, I can't see
I don't know if it's the best moment
But I start to want to understand
To see if the falling curtain
Is dragging the veil of my faith

Why do they push me to steal
The land and bread from men with as little as me?
If at home killing innocents is for the infamous and bastards
Why outside they call it valor?

I cut dozens of heads to make a change of piece
On a board of sand and salt
And I realize
That after the storm everything remains the same
Different water but the same sea

It was supposed to not go like this
That peace should come to me now
Yet I lie without
Being able to keep track of what I did wrong
I search for the memory of the moment
When I gave in and let myself be convinced
That the glory of heroes is worth
What I could lose in war

How could shields and flags make me
Fight blindly without fearing to lose or tear off the skin
Of puppets devoid of sanity?
And the suture marks from when they removed
Mine too?

And in case it helps
I recognize that I've been an idiot
And it leaves my soul broken not being able to go back

To force those treacherous dogs
To swallow so many scepters
As many lives they forced me to take