Avant de m'assagir

Before I calm down
Before dropping anchor
To spare my heart
To nurture my health
Before telling
My memories in ink
To want without being able
To count my laurels
Before this season
Before this retreat
I want to jump the bridges
The walls and the high edges
I want to break the ranks
The frames and the windows
I want to live my life
And not live my death
I want to live in my time
Sabotage the customs
Pillage the conventions
Sabotage the regulations
Before this old age
Before this bad cold
That will kill my desires
And my thirty-two teeth
And if I could
I would do even better
I would split myself
To live as it should be
The day for what it is
Life for what it's worth
That's dying my life
And not living my death
I don't want to know anything
I don't want to understand
I want to start over
I want to see, I want to take
There will always be time
And never too late
To hang up your skates
To extinguish your gaze
I don't want to survive
I don't want to endure
I want to take my time
To find myself, to free myself
To board the wrong boat
To a country or a port
And die my life well
And not live my death
But at the first turn
At the first sorrow
I start to moan
To cry over my fate
To think about later
To count my pennies
And to live my life
And to live my death
I look for your neck
I take you by the waist
We become so small, small
When we are afraid
I am no longer a giant
I am no longer a rogue
I nurture my health
I spare my heart
And then I start over
And then I repeat
That before this season
Before this retreat
You have to jump the bridges
The walls and the high edges
You have to live your life
And not live your death
And in the meantime
Spring thaws
The day goes about its days
The night has its vigils
It's by starting over
That we learn to live
Whether it's true or not
I believe in it