Dentro de Mi Cabeza

I have something to confess
I know that sometimes what I say is confusing and
It might seem like it’s due to substance use
Or whatever, but the reality
Is very different from that, very different
What’s happening is that
There’s a monster in my head, it makes me say what it thinks
Well, it took control
It’s turned me into its prey And sometimes it makes me lie
To change my clothes or this tone
I don’t know who I am anymore

I’m ambivalent, the vulgar yet eloquent
An honest ruler, a madman who’s coherent
I’m a human who doesn’t fit in with my kind
The philanthropic misanthrope who helps screw people over
A strange guy, I’m for those who haven’t been me
A visionary, just by my imagination
A wise man for those who didn’t care
About those topics I’ve studied daily with great obsession

Inside my head lives another being
And I don’t know if I’ll ever see it
But I know that being exists and also
Says that no one will believe me that it’s true

Fuck, I just can’t understand what’s happening in my mind
It’s like, like I see the world through a stranger, you know?
And I don’t like it
I live a contradiction, I love it even though I say I don’t
Because not everything I think comes out with my voice
I run from the spotlight, though I crave the attention
A histrionic schizo, almost a fictional entity
I seek equality and at the same time to be superior
In my life a pacifist and in my art a dictator
Death promised me apotheosis if I go
I told her I’d achieve it even before saying goodbye
And I don’t understand what
The letters of this monster inside me mean
I don’t know if it’s a genius or a madman, if there’s a distinction
And if anyone understood a bit, please explain it to me

Inside my head lives another being
And I don’t know if I’ll ever see it
But I know that being exists and also
Says that no one will believe me that it’s true