Je Suis La Solitaire

I am the loner, alone even among my own
Alone in this era that suffocates me like the silences of my sorrows
Alone, 'cause my steps come from far away
Tired but standing, smiling despite the hits
Before I collapse, I hold on
For how long will my past be a burden I drag but flattens me when suddenly my life turns steep
Or worse, at every turn it pulls me into the abyss
Listen, I’m sinking in the poison but I accept if the End rings
I am the loner, wandering through life
Wandering through the cities
Never too far from the void
Knots in my gut remind me of that void
That nothing fills
And when the good deceives me then nothing matters anymore!
So leave me in my corner!
I don’t want to share my pain
It’s for your own good 'cause the suffering hits me at all hours
Out of modesty or fear, this silence wraps me
I’ve only seen the violence of the system so excuse my lack of nuance
Endless chase, I can’t let go of the ropes
My God, I’m letting go, my tortured soul is in pain
My rage, nothing softens it
See the messed-up times
Despite the tears, we all laughed when peace got shot down
My life a heist and my past took everything from me
Fled like my heart
Pushing my happiness into oblivion
And when my faith dozes off, the rage messes with me, even knocks me down
Oh my God, forgive my flaws and my trials
I’m lost towards loss
Is it an unconscious suicide?
Don’t talk to me about heredity, I don’t even know whose blood I carry
Losing it, it gets worse when you sleep under the bridges
I fled the desert but I still have quicksand under my shoes
Child of the outside, I arrived here naive
Only the moon can understand or console me 'cause it saw me grow
Life threw me into the night and then left me alone
I am the loner, even with my heart filled with my brothers and sisters
I’ve seen the worst of the worst up close
No secret garden, a field of wounds
Dear Star, I’m scared, so please sing!
Don’t abandon me in the turmoil of my head
I’m scared, don’t leave me, I’m lost without your help
I am the loner, but who can understand?
I don’t even have the words to express what I’d like to make heard
My survival instinct orders me to take off
To drop everything, rap included, 'cause I know here I’ll end up crazy!
And while peace plays stingy, this world deceives us
I’m not at home here, my heart stuck in Latin America
Now I know even if the ocean separates us
I hear your cries, your rage, your fears, and your hope
I’m with you! And I won’t miss the call
I’m homesick, it’s weird 'cause I barely know it
I am the loner without land and without ties
Only rap keeps me on a leash and holds me back when
I break free
Freedom, I’ve only seen through a keyhole
My nerves hurt! Have I hit too hard against the walls of my cell?
I dream of a break but death lives at its expense
My life exhausts me and fatigue sends me back to squatting the benches
I shouted: Get out of line!
But with age, everyone ends up fitting in and I’m left here facing
These members
So I continue my path alone
Always, I didn’t choose, but I keep going with faith, brother
So leave me in peace if you don’t understand
The system excluded me, mistreated me, I won’t fit in!
I am the loner, the burden on my shoulder
In search of knowledge but certainly not the kind you learn in school
I believe in God despite the times
In Life and I will fight! I’m hard-headed, ask my friends!
My unshakeable faith
I read the signs of life, what! You don’t think they’re that reliable?!
So drop it, 'cause only peace resides in me when my impulses leave me
Anger my best enemy
Oh Lord, help me
From my memory, it wants my skin, please stay close to me
I have less and less strength, I’m losing myself in these years
I’m young but so old but as they say: We get by
Despite the trouble in my head, the doubt in the Grail
On edge but where’s the devil, let’s burn him!
This world shouts strange values without valiant soldiers
Here these bastards sow misfortune and drink blood in their soda
It’s the routine! I’ve often been told: My sister
But take this pliers, my lord
Since happiness has closed shop!
Born in a world that fed me on scraps
Wanted to dumb me down! Worship money which is just a tool?!
Pfffffff, leave me in my margin!
Heart full of faith even if sometimes I lose myself a bit in my walk
At night, I hear screams
Bits of the past, destroyed dreams
Debris of my memory in love with sad echoes feeding my depression
And then I close my eyes tight
Waiting for the angels to come talk to me in my sleep for a bit of comfort
Morale down and down, the bottom awaits me
The years pass and I take it and take it but until when?
'Cause already my soul stumbles
Put your threats in your ass, Mr. Officer
You can hit, I’m used to it!
The physical pain anesthetized by the inner one
That deteriorates me, sometimes accuses my existence of errors
So I rise alone with my hands to the sky
Misunderstood and choked by this shit of a century!

I am the loner, you know the one they take
For a wild one, that the world points at but no one understands
I am the loner, sometimes a slave to my torments
Unstable in the routine but always at ease in movement
I am the loner, in love with the unexpected
Being rich and a slave, I’d rather be free and on the street
I am the loner, the one who doesn’t listen to orders
Alone in this era, alone but at peace with others.