Tu Madre Tiene Bigote

I was walking on the sidewalk of the market square street
I had gone to get a penny's worth of peas
When suddenly some horrifying voices started sounding inside my head
Voices telling me that my mom has... a mustache!

Your mother has a mustache!
Your mother has a mustache!

Your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother
Has a mustache!
Your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother
Has a mustache!

And she doesn't shave it because when she shaves it, she gets a white spot
Under her nose that makes her even uglier.

Your mother has a mustache!

And here at school, everyone calls you the son of the mustached seal
Who mops the stairs. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Mustache, mustache, mustache, mustache,
Mustache, mustache, mustache, noooo.

Your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother
Has a mustache!
Your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother
Has a mustache!

And you will carry the stigma of your mother's mustache all your life
Even if you send her to shave it, ha ha ha.

Be careful not to get caught by the mother of the one who doesn't catch you
Because if she finds out that you call her a seal
She will skin you, she will take your skin
For calling her a seal, for calling her a seal

Hide so she doesn't catch you because she will strangle you
For calling her a seal, for calling her a seal, for calling her a seal
For calling her a seal, for calling her a seal

Hide because she knows that you're going around saying
What does she have on her face? What does she have on her face?
What does she have, what does she have, what does she have, what does she have...

Mustache, mustache, mustache, mustache...

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha

Your mother has a mustache!
What a beautiful big mustache.

Your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother
Has a mustache!
Your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother, your mother
Has a mustache!

Your father is a cop