Tengo Envidia

I don't know what's happening to me
And I can't take it anymore
I can hear my soul
Breaking into pieces every time it tries to speak

I'm envious of those who wake up early
Of those who can sleep at night without pills, without madness
They lied to me; time doesn't heal
But it teaches you that you're not just a piece of raw meat

And that puts your feet on the ground
Like life fucks you over like a dog when it's really bad
You stumble on the same stone on the same path
And it hurts even more knowing that the stone is yourself

I'm envious of those who blindly believe in God
Because they delegate their sins and destiny to another
Of those who deal with faith and not with the mind. I
Am the one who refuses to have finished the journey alone

I'm envious of the fake and the coward
Of those who offer help when they already know it's too late
There are losses that relieve... Tell me, what do you bring me?
I can't keep shining at the cost of extinguishing my light

Why does darkness embrace me?
Sometimes I think that if I leave, no one will notice my escape
No matter what I write, even if I run out of saliva
I feel like I'm like Egypt and they only want to see my ruins

You know? Peace is not a defeat
I'm not a coward, it's just that even pain runs out
And maybe this is my last drink, so strip me of my clothes
Enjoy my broken soul and squeeze me until the last note

I'm envious of music
For being a messenger dove without language
The years show you that envy is stupid
And that you can't go out of style if you've never been a trend

Many are just visiting
And you'll see who's real when they no longer need you
They'll sell you apologies for being another ego addict
But who's to blame, tell me, the player or the game?

And I dare to give advice
Because sometimes to advise you have to sin not preach by example
Now is the time to look good in the picture
Because we will be what the world remembers of us

Like a silent cancer that slowly suffocates me
My songs are my vows and the wedding bells
Now I know I'm crazy, and madness is dangerous
She wants me to be her husband... And she my wives

I don't know what's happening to me
And I can't take it anymore
I can hear my soul
Breaking into pieces every time it starts to speak

I'm envious of those who haven't written their own death
Of those whose lives still depend on a myth or luck
While you may feel like I'm exaggerating
I assumed it will happen, just that I don't know when yet

If you ask me not to lie to you
The truth is I'm so tired of
Being asked: How are you?
And answering: Finding myself

It's not too much (it's not too much)
To miss each other (to miss each other)
To know how to be silent (to know how to be silent)
And listen to your fears (and listen to their fears)
But may those fears (but may those fears)
Never silence you (never silence you)
Never fail yourself, for a memory
Be like time, don't wait for anyone

I jump from one past to another and I'm not a horse in a chess game
I know I can do everything, but I'm human, I can't handle everything at once
I envy those who live deceived and truly think they are much stronger
Maybe I feel too much and simply I'm envious

Of those who don't feel