Mi Primer Beso

My first kiss was
More late than soon
I was 16 and that silly little mustache
She came close to me

Thank goodness because if I had to do it
Maybe I would still be more virgin than Mary
But everyone's moment comes
Where there is no other way out

She said to me: I hope that's the phone
When my pants started to shake
And I said to her: No, darling, that's my manhood
That has been hidden for 16 years

On the way home we stopped at 100 doorways
And I could only unbutton a couple of buttons
That's why when I went to pee
You can't imagine

The pain I felt in my wallet
When a municipal officer came up to me
But kid, what are you doing peeing on the sidewalk

It took her 5 seconds to tell the policeman
I don't even know him
Exactly the same time it took me
To hide my joint discreetly in her purse

My first kiss was
Somewhat contradictory
It's true, there was pleasure
And a hell of a pain

Because I never thought
That the first time would hurt so much
That you end up hotter
Than the guy with the trident
And finally came the hard moment
Of the sad farewell

She gave me a phone number to call her
And it turned out to be a Chinese restaurant's
And when I called asking for Yolanda
And a Chinese man read me the fried rice menu

Rays and sparks started to come out
Above my head, as if in a comic strip
Living sad and desolate with the only comfort
Of having annoyed you

When your father discovered in your purse
A suspicious smell coming from low countries
The following weekend
When we saw each other face to face

He didn't even want to greet me
When I said playfully
Baby, I'm your refreshment
Shake me before using me

And that's how my journey in love began
The worst part is that time passes and I haven't improved much
I'm still that skinny kid

What is true is that I haven't kissed again
Nor will I ever do it with closed eyes
That's only for lovers who spend their lives daydreaming