Si Estallo (Poema)

If the dark sky weighed too much
On my stomach and surrendered me
Don't judge what you don't know, drawing premature conclusions
If you only had friction with me, that's not the way
If vertigo became unbearable one early morning
And looking back was a Russian roulette with five bullets

Don't look for excuses to tear my wings apart
A heart belongs to those who use it, not those who forget it
You won't understand me if the air you exhale
Is chloroform over an already asleep solidarity
If the wounds bleed too much
Greet the silence in my final scream
And don't ask me to say goodbye

If I leave where the years fall
And dreams, you might cry
But try not to repeat my mistakes
And keep what I teach
Don't analyze my dark circles and tell me you're waiting for me
With the smile from when I was little
If my chest hurts too much
From an overdose of piercing emotions

Put yourself in my shoes, even if you have the armor
Of the innocence I had before breaking my bandages without hesitation
You'll see I'm not lying if you do the same
With an exercise in realism
Ah! And give regards to the inhabitants of the abyss
If you end up living in the world of feelings
If the absences end up absenting me
From the desire to live and I couldn't recover the elixir
Don't be selfish blaming me for my autistic passion
And follow the trail of paths that start without me

By discovering the ones I opened for you, you'll make me still exist
Tell them, on my behalf, to screw the ants that repudiate me
I invite you to dance and sing with the cicadas in the rain
If I couldn't find the trick to dry my invisible tears
Don't try to tie me to the earth
I've already caused a lot of trouble to those who prevent us from being free
And fight those who imprison you

Taking the shortcut to death is neither cowardly nor brave
After all, we all fear the unknown
And by committing suicide, one plunges
But this is not an apology for going through the tunnel
I love life madly, but not what surrounds it
The point is, if in a way I resigned as a living being
Or simply believed it's time to have no more time
If you bother to judge me, at least listen to what I've felt
And if you want, declare yourself my enemy, but calm down
Because even the most insensitive cries sooner or later
And if I think it's too late, I'll leave early

Just as dawn breaks and the black moon
Continues to occupy my pupils, being able to banish it
Just by closing my eyes forever
If anxiety and sadness couldn't be tamed
One day I'll explode, keep the shapes of my clouds; no, keep the lightning