Conflicto

My destiny, it marks the path
I'm walking with strong and fine steps
Many times I stumble and make mistakes
While hope hasn't traveled with me
Many times I stop and don't find my way
I have no maps or compasses, I'm the center
Only inside I find the movement
Conflict that drives me
To start anew

In my body death and resurrection
Once every month my heart bleeds
Doors closing
Border crossings bridges that break after I pass
Illusions erased from the mind
Lids where I've even felt insane
Delinquent of trapped emotions
Sending rays to the sun from my window
There are days I don't get out of bed
Hunger goes for a walk and tastes like nothing
I immerse myself in Alejandra's poetry
And the sad boleros in Chavela Vargas' voice
It's not easy to resurrect
If there are tears from waking up
But it's the only way to move forward
Bury, mourn, grieve, and leave it behind

My destiny, it marks the path
I'm walking with strong and fine steps
Many times I stumble and make mistakes
While hope hasn't traveled with me
Many times I stop and don't find my way
I have no maps or compasses, I'm the center
Only inside I find the movement
Conflict that drives me
To start anew

Bipolar, tripolar, situation, unease
Bitterness, depression
In pieces, I've broken into pieces
I usually patch myself up but there are always traces left
Betrayals where I lose faith
Feeling that love becomes a cliché
An ice floe in the center of my chest
Kisses forgotten when saying I love you
Closing my eyes and not being able to dream
Looking for reality elsewhere
On TV, in books, on the radio
Smoking away minutes wandering in the past
Not answering calls, avoiding words
Looking for friends who won't ask me anything
Going to the park with a notebook and pencil
Crying as I can, mascara running over the beats

My destiny, it marks the path
I'm walking with strong and fine steps
Many times I stumble and make mistakes
While hope hasn't traveled with me
Many times I stop and don't find my way
I have no maps or compasses, I'm the center
Only inside I find the movement
Conflict that drives me
To start anew

Suddenly one morning there's a breath
The mist clears on the path
A new life begins, sadness without certainty
Dissolves, it's my nature
I let the sun and wind dry my tears
For now, I don't want suffering anymore
It was just a refuge for shedding skin
It was painful but I shine again