Solo

It's another day that I wake up sad
Another night I've dreamed about dad
I dream he's here, but upon waking he's gone
And the guilt from that day doesn't go away

Another morning depressed without purpose
Letting time slip away on the couch
I live as if living were a punishment
Sentenced in a present I can't fully accept

I don't recognize myself, I don't know who I am
I feel a huge emptiness all the time
I look at photos from the past smiling
When I didn't know what I had was perfect

Now I just close my eyes and think
That the only thing that calms this torment
Is trying to convince myself that nothing lasts forever
But the moment doesn't come and it's because

I hardly see mom or the little one
She's grown so much without me realizing
Mom always working tirelessly
And I miss her in songs like this

Brother, you who understand me know what I'm talking about
Having each other is a miracle
I want to see you big and strong as I always think of you
Wherever I go when I step on stage

Everything I feel now scares me
This fear tortures me with questions
I became so fragile that any random thought
Sneaks into my sick mind and my castle crumbles

And the never-ending noise, my head floods
With thousands of memories that will never return
No one cares, my dying soul
I don't want to know anything about this unjust life

Alone, if the day ends and I don't have you close by, at night I feel alone
Sometimes I look at yesterday's photos with you but I'm alone
I walk daily so far from everything thinking that now I'm alone
I break in silence and cry, I spend the days

It's another same day, another battle with my head
Another day I eat alone at the table
And everything weighs on me, I'm not one to pray
I stopped believing in everything, that's why I don't make promises, now

I don't expect hope and I fall asleep with sadness
I understood many years ago that my life ends
That in the end everything ends and another cycle begins
And that the future is nothing but the past returning

What's the point of having everything when I want
If nothing I have makes me free
The only thing I want can't be bought with money
My mother's smile is what makes me invincible

I still carry fears, I hide behind a but
I fear like that hyena when it sees the tiger approaching
Time we don't have slips through my fingers
And yet I talk to the sky knowing it's not possible

Sometimes there are days when I just think of giving up
Other times I think I'm exaggerating and that my life is a miracle
Sometimes I think I'm worthless and other times I try to make it
I have days when I'm God and others when I'm like the devil

Everything tastes bitter to me and it's hard to explain
Memories are engraved in the soul like darts
I live every moment as if something is missing
I've searched inside and out and never manage to find it

I know I'm different now, and I have to accept it
Life takes things away and gives you nothing in return
I don't know what I want, maybe I'm denying it
You never start from 0 when you've been hurt so much

I was always honest when I told you about my tears
Also a liar every time I wanted to escape
Maybe there's no secret behind all of this
And life is simply for everyone, except for me

Alone, if the day ends and I don't have you close by, at night I feel alone
Sometimes I look at yesterday's photos with you but I'm alone
I walk daily so far from everything thinking that now I'm alone
I break in silence and cry, I spend the days

Alone, if the day ends and I don't have you close by, at night I feel alone
Sometimes I look at yesterday's photos with you but I'm alone
I walk daily so far from everything thinking that now I'm alone
I break in silence and cry, I spend the days

Alone, if the day ends and I don't have you close by, at night I feel alone
Sometimes I look at yesterday's photos with you but I'm alone
I walk daily so far from everything thinking that now I'm alone
I break in silence and cry, I spend the days