Carta a Santa Claus

Dear Santa Claus,
You may be surprised that I am writing to you on December 26,
but I want to clarify certain things that have happened to me
since I sent you my letter, full of hopes,
where I asked you to bring me a bicycle,
an electric train, a Nintendo 64, and a pair of skates.

I want to tell you Santa Claus
that I killed myself studying all year,
so much so that not only was I one of the top students in class,
but I got straight A's in school;
I won't lie to you.
No one behaved better than me
with their parents, siblings,
friends, and neighbors.

I ran errands WITHOUT CHARGING, helped
the elderly cross the street
and there was never anything I wouldn't do for others,
and yet, HOW DARE YOU SANTA CLAUS!!!
To leave under the tree a damn spinning top,
a crappy trumpet
and a damn pair of socks, WHAT A MESS!

What the hell do you think, fatso?
So I behave like an idiot all year
for you to come with crap like this;
and not only that, the idiot son
of the neighbor who is stupid and rude,
spoiled, disobedient, who yells at his mom,
that idiot you brought him everything
he asked for. That's why now I want an earthquake
or something like that, to take us all
to hell, since with a Santa Claus like you,
so incompetent and fake, it's better if the earth swallows us.

But of course, don't fail to come next year
because I'm going to stone your damn
and mangy reindeer: Starting with that crap
Rudolph who has a gay name
I'm going to scare them away so you have to screw yourself,
walking on foot like me, bastard!,
since the bike I asked for was to go to school,
which is far as hell from home.

Aaah!!! and I wouldn't want to say goodbye
without mentioning the mother who gave birth to you
I hope that when you have gone very high up
the damn sleigh turns around on you
and you hit yourself hard for being such a son of a bitch!
But I warn you that next year
you will know what a damn child is,
and a little brat.